GEORGE WOOLARD (1996), ”LESSONS WITH LAUGHTER”, THOMSON AND HEINLE PUBLISHING HOUSE

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5.

HOMOPHONES

Homophones are two words which have the same sound but different meanings. Complete the following jokes. The humour depends on homophones in each one.

1.      Waiter, what do you call this?

It is ..... soup, sir.

I do not care what it is ..... . What is it now?

 

2.      Have you ever hunted .....?

No, I always hunt with my clothes on.

 

3.      Why are black clouds like somebody riding a horse?

Because they both hold the ..... .

 

4.      A teacher saw two boys fighting in the playground.

Stop! You know the school rules – no fighting ...... .

But, sir, we were not fighting ..... . We were fighting quietly.

 

5.      What is the effect of seven days dieting?

They make one ..... .

 

6.      Did you hear about the novelist who lived on the ninth floor of a block of flats?

He dropped six ..... into a wastepaper basket and lived.

 

7.      How can I get rid of my headache?

Hit your head against a window and the ..... will disappear.

 

8.      Fortune teller: Would you like your palm ..... , sir?

Man: No thanks, I like the colour it is now.

 

9.      What did the small shy stone say?

I wish I was a little ..... .

 

 

READ/ RED

STORIES/ STOREYS

RAINS / REINS

BEAN / BEEN

BOLDER / BOULDER

PANE / PAIN

BARE / BEAR

ALLOWED / ALOUD

WEEK / WEAK

 

 

 

        ANSWER KEY

1.      BEAN / BEEN

2.      BARE / BEAR

3.      RAINS / REINS

4.      ALLOWED / ALOUD

5.      WEEK / WEAK

6.      STORIES/ STOREYS

7.      PANE / PAIN

8.      READ/ RED

9.      BOLDER / BOULDER

 

 

 

Sursa:

GEORGE WOOLARD (1996), ”LESSONS WITH LAUGHTER”, THOMSON AND HEINLE PUBLISHING HOUSE

 

 

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